Blastoff! With Captain Blastin

On the Occasion of My Tenth High School Reunion

Sat, 18 May 2013 11:29:02 -0400

In just a few hours I’ll be attending the above event.

I’m excited, even though I was an angsty mess in high school. I’m excited to have a job I can speak of proudly, to be in good shape physically, mentally and emotionally, and to generally be someone I am happy with.

The interesting thing is, reunions are for, you know, reuniting, but according to the RSVP list, most of the people I really haven’t seen at all since high school aren’t even coming. I’m already in touch with most of the attendees. And we also had a makeshift reunion after our old headmaster died in 2011.

So it won’t be a ton of long-lost reuniting. More of a check-in. Perhaps more people will come to the 15th.

But I’m looking forward to it nonetheless.

Lucky

Fri, 17 May 2013 16:43:16 -0400

One of the great joys of the new level of stability that I have is that when I check my accounts, because I’m good at saving, I always have a bit more than I expect to have.

The stress of wondering how many hours I will be assigned has abated, and I really can relax.

This is something most people on earth will never feel, and none of us who feel it should ever take the first level of financial stability - several steps below luxury - for granted.

Photo

Thu, 16 May 2013 15:42:43 -0400

Trivia, 5/16/13

Thu, 16 May 2013 12:28:06 -0400

Previous Answer: F. Scott Fitzgerald. (Think about it.)

Question: What kind of animal has the world’s longest lifespan?

Yoga, Week Two

Wed, 15 May 2013 14:11:12 -0400

Another week of yoga. I did slightly better this time. I held the balance, and although I didn’t even know how to start trying the shoulder stand because it makes me feel like I’m going to break my neck, it was a good experience.

Aside from the stillness aspect, which I fail at, the issue is that it reminds me of the many many years when every athletic activity led to me feeling embarrassed and shamed. I failed at skiing, basketball, baseball, football and swimming. I failed at martial arts, snowboarding and rugby. I failed at every sport you can think of, and those I didn’t outright fail at, it was merely because I never played them.

So I finally got good at two things: lifting and running. I feel confident in my ability to excel at these activities.

And now here I am trying something new that makes me feel some of the same things I felt throughout childhood.

But I’m not giving up, because it can be a useful addition to my fitness. I just hate feeling like that clumsy, useless, unathletic kid again. I didn’t miss him at all.

Peace and love,

Justin PBG

Teehee 3 balls

Tue, 14 May 2013 13:18:34 -0400

Teehee 3 balls

NY Sucks?

Mon, 13 May 2013 16:44:35 -0400

NY sucks if you are impoverished, not a fan of crowds, or prefer to drive everywhere. If you need nature next to you, it’s not the city for you (or, most of it isn’t). And if you really hate winter or muggy summers, it’s really not the worst place (plenty are worse), but sure, it might not be for you.

That said, it’s a northeastern American city. The weather is going to be exactly what it is for that region, and less severely so (in one or the other direction) than DC or Boston. It’s a large city with a huge population, and, yes, it’s crowded.

NYC is also very expensive. Truth.

But come on now. None of this is news. Is it hard to find a nice apartment for a good price? Yes. This has been the case for a long time. It will continue to be the case.

Acting like NYC is the devil doesn’t reflect poorly on the city (which is actually pretty affordable for a city this large and safe) but on the complainer. Of course we have a lot of issues here, but there is no major metropolis that doesn’t.

Can things improve? Sure. And I hope they do. But this city can give you almost anything you might want, and we ought to remember that.

/endrant

Trivia, 5/12/13

Sun, 12 May 2013 23:27:17 -0400

Previous Answer: It’s a cat. LOL, cats.

Question: It’s Mothers’ Day. Mariska Hargitay’s famous mother was killed in a car accident when she was a child. Who was she?

Progress!

Sat, 11 May 2013 12:53:29 -0400

There are enough LGBT folks getting married these days that it’s regular enough for me to judge them for getting married too young.

Now that’s progress. :)

Trivia, 5/11/13

Sat, 11 May 2013 12:35:27 -0400

Previous Answer: Bhutan, which forbids mountain climbing.

Question: What did the makers of Monopoly replace the iron with?

Trivia, 5/11/13

Sat, 11 May 2013 12:35:19 -0400

Previous Answer: Bhutan, which forbids mountain climbing.

Question: What did the makers of Monopoly replace the iron with?

Useless Lessons

Fri, 10 May 2013 09:28:13 -0400

When we complain (and rightly so) about the American school system, we point to places like South Korea or Scandinavia, where education is, to some people’s view, perfect.

But we should really be comparing ourselves to ourselves, and not just with standardized test scores.

South Korean high school students are abjectly miserable and not very skilled at socializing in a mature manner. When they fail their massive Korean SAT test, their lives are over. Sometimes literally, when they kill themselves in groups. Korean universities barely had admissions departments until a few years ago because it was just a matter of whether or not you had a high enough score (and could pay; forget about financial aid in most cases). We shouldn’t want that. They have tons of their own issues, but because they look orderly and don’t drop out of school, it looks shiny and nice to us.

Scandinavia is populated by eleven wealthy white people. Their race is not the important thing - it’s a factor but it’s not the most important one - but the fact that they are almost exclusively from the same culture and origin means a lot of the conflicts we have always had are not relevant to them. They do a lot of great, utopian things over there. But their population is tiny and homogenous. (And of course, SK’s population is homogenous too).

We live in a massive, mixed country, which is both amazing and awful. The lessons that apply to Scandinavia or South Korea don’t fit us very easily.

And frankly, it all comes down to the big thing that I learned in my Learner Assessment course, namely that it’s very easy to make a test that has hard numbers but hard to evaluate students in a full and accurate way.

Our education system has a lot of issues, mostly that the money goes to the wrong things and that those with means can do active things with their time when not in the classroom (like I did).

But we’re not going to fix anything by pointing at Scandinavia or South Korea and saying that we fall short in comparison. We’re never going to be Scandinavia or South Korea, and frankly, we shouldn’t want to be. We have a ton of work to do - this is my career, after all - but focusing on educationally irrelevant countries is not going to help us get very much done.

Peace and love,

Justin PBG

Useless Lessons

Fri, 10 May 2013 09:27:57 -0400

When we complain (and rightly so) about the American school system, we point to places like South Korea or Scandinavia, where education is, to some people’s view, perfect.

But we should really be comparing ourselves to ourselves, and not just with standardized test scores.

We live in a massive, mixed country, which is both amazing and awful. The lessons that apply to Scandinavia or South Korea don’t fit us very easily.

Our education system has a lot of issues, mostly that the money goes to the wrong things and that those with means can do active things with their time when not in the classroom (like I did).

Peace and love,

Justin PBG

Trivia, 5/9/13

Thu, 09 May 2013 12:11:11 -0400

Previous Answer: Femur.

Question: What country possesses the world’s highest unclimbed mountain peak?

Stillness

Wed, 08 May 2013 16:48:33 -0400

I’m very very bad at being still. I don’t have ADD or ADHD. I am very good at focusing, but my kind of focus is running a long distance or writing a paper quickly. But today I tried something I’ve long been somewhat afraid of, and it didn’t go very well: yoga.

Yoga requires stillness and calm. It feeds off and provides inner peace. I used to laugh it off somewhat, but that shit really does give you a workout (so long as you actually do it regularly), and it’s definitely out of my skill and comfort zone.

But that’s fine. I like a challenge. I don’t mind looking somewhat silly. But looking silly is something I enjoy when I choose to do it, not when it happens by chance or by accident. And balance is just something that I don’t have. I’m.. not sure if I really truly lack it at this point or if it’s just a complex for me (one that leads to me becoming worried whenever I know I’m going to have to balance and thus freaking out).

I want to get better at balance. It’s a physical thing that would be, ya know, beneficial to have. Even if I never become a real yogi, I think it would be helpful for recovery from races, so I’m going to keep doing it. Because I want to be able to balance. I want to be able to put my damn foot to the floor behind my head like some of my co-workers apparently can.

My brand of fitness is fierce and aggressive. I charge ahead, I curse at myself to motivate myself. Yogis do things gently. I’m a bull in a china shop. I don’t think I can stop being a bull, but perhaps I can learn not to break all the china in the shop.

Stay tuned…

Peace and love,

Justin PBG

Trivia, 5/8/13

Wed, 08 May 2013 12:04:11 -0400

Previous Answer: Tea!

Question: What is the thickest bone in your body?

Social Formation

Tue, 07 May 2013 13:41:40 -0400

Think about how much of how you socialize begins to form in high school. The music you get really into, the movies you like, the social crowd you’re a part of, it all has a hold on you as an adult.

Sure, we grow up and change a lot, but those times are so formative, to our benefit or detriment, much as we hope to fully divorce ourselves from them.

Even if we manage to transform ourselves, we’re probably comparing our new selves to the version that existed then.

All of these are reasons why adolescence is a motherfucker, but I say it to say now that, confident though I might be, if I sense I am being deliberately excluded from something I want to take part in, it riles me up. In high school and the beginning of college, I really was being deliberately and maliciously kept out, but now, when it happens, it’s probably just my over-active imagination. It’s a bad habit that I have mostly broken, but it still sets me on edge to be excluded, and it started in high school.

The funny thing about this is that I am very excited about my high school reunion next weekend. I haven’t risen to great heights - and the list of RSVPs is depressingly low - but I hope to show those folks who I have grown into. I think I’m someone I can be proud of and happy with.

But I still have some little hang-ups that started in high school, and I wonder if I’ll ever be able to fully beat them back.

Peace and love,

JustinPBG

Sympathy Up and Down

Mon, 06 May 2013 14:33:27 -0400

As I spend more and more time working with seniors, I find that, while a handful of them are miserable bastards, most of them are kind and giving and simply want a place to go or something to do now that they have extra free time. Some of them really just want a hot meal, as we do serve many low-income (or even homeless) folks.

It has made me far more sympathetic towards seniors who need extra time to get on the bus, and to the the disabled who require the special seating. It’s not that I was a dick about it before and thought people shouldn’t get special attention; it’s just that my first thought was always, “Oh lord, this is going to take a while.”

But while my affection for and attention to seniors has made me more sympathetic towards them, goddamn do I find lazy young people irritating.

The fact is, at some point, our bodies will betray us. If we are lucky, it won’t happen until right before we go, but we need to do whatever we can, while we’re young, to stave off our body’s gradual deterioration.

Look, in college, we’re all dumb. It’s a privilege we receive by entering such a bubble. People in other cultures live at home right through college (if they go), so it’s really not a “haha no parents I’m gonna be silly for four years” time. But for us, sure, that’s how it’s long been and how it probably will remain for a while.

But by the time we hit twenty-five, or at the very very latest, thirty, we need to take very good care of ourselves. I’m not a proponent of any kind of abstinence (aside from cigarettes), but we need to limit our consumption of junk and increase our healthy food intake. We need to be active and consciously so. This also extends to money: if we can afford to make a budget and build savings, we must, because, among other things, health costs will mount as we near the end, and we’ll need a way to pay for it without assuming our progeny will be able to do so.

Young, able-bodied folks who put no effort into taking care of themselves are just digging a grave. I only hope those that I care about who fall into this category can snap out of it, and fast.

Peace and love,

Justin PBG

Wardrobe

Sun, 05 May 2013 18:33:27 -0400

Again, wading into luxuriating in privilege territory, so acknowledging this up front.

I’ve never really cared much about fashion. My parents have always wanted me to, but I was always a jeans and t-shirt guy, or maybe a button-down when it was colder. For much of my (nascent) adult life, I really didn’t know how to dress. I wore clothes that were ill-fitting or cheap, and mostly ended up with several dozen t-shirts too many and not enough real adult man clothes.

I’ve started to change this, as highlighted in previous posts, and come the end of this month, I might actually be able to say that I have what the adults call a “wardrobe.” I’ll be able to choose based on color and style instead of merely what’s cleanest. I won’t have to wear my good shoes into the ground because I’ll be able to choose. And I’m going to be able to say, with earned confidence, that I look good, and that I have a certain look. I’m going for sleek, trim and fit, in both my body and what I put on it, and just like my ability to call myself an athlete, being able to say I have a wardrobe instead of just “a bunch of clothes” will be another threshold to have crossed.

Now to acquire an actual adult-size closet.…

Peace and love,

Justin PBG

Photo

Sun, 05 May 2013 14:11:31 -0400