“The tragic slaying of teenager Trayvon Martin has become national news, especially so now that Geraldo Rivera went on Fox News to place blame on the teen’s hoodie instead of his killer. “I think the hoodie is as much responsible for Trayvon Martin’s death as George Zimmerman was,” is actually a thing Rivera said before “urging the parents of black and Latino youngsters to not let their children go out wearing hoodies.” Twitter immediately became abuzz with people abhorred by Rivera’s logic, comparing it to arguing that women shouldn’t wear short skirts or they’ll get raped. One of our favorite retort came from Questlove: “What, I gotta stroll around rocking a tux 24/7 so i can put others who are ignorant at ease?”—Huffpo. Also, Questlove is awesome.
Has anyone ever finished a game of Monopoly where no one gave up by the end? Like everyone was still engaged? That shit takes like nine hours. And I loved it as a kid. But I still never finished a game.
The movie they’re making - yes, really - should be nine hours long.
I’m sure my friend is about to write about this. But I’m writing about it too.
I freely acknowledge that women do this too (particularly privileged ones), but it’s mostly the people in a dominant position, so it’s mostly men, and mostly white men at that.
The minor, tiny, restriction of being a white man in today’s world is that you’re going to get called out if you publicly - or professionally - say something untoward about someone based on their membership in a group of which you are not a member. Women, LGBT folks, minorities, etc.
We get oppression, you get less license to make unkind jokes or comments. Oh how even.
But a lot of folks can’t accept this. So when someone from these groups pokes fun back at them, they get O-FEN-DED. Witness Senor Gingrich getting all up in arms after Robert DeNiro joked about the country not being ready for a white first lady.
See, that was funny. But whether or not it’s funny, it’s DeNiro making fun of his OWN GROUP (white people, and specifically white men, really). The joke wasn’t about the women. When people said the country wasn’t ready for a black president, it wasn’t about Obama really so much as it was about the country (read: white people).
But Newt is Newt so, well, he acted Newtly.
Let me lay down the ground rules for you.
By the way, the ground rules do not guarantee that you will be funny or insightful. But they will stop you from being an ass.
1. You can always make fun of your own group.
Define said group how you like, but make sure it’s widely accepted that you’re a part of it. I’m part native american but I don’t know enough about that part of me to go around making “Indian” jokes or something.
But black folks? Yeah. I can talk about that.
2. Do not rag on the people beneath you on the social ladder and expect not to be an ass.
This does not mean you can’t TALK about them. If you’re being honest and forthright you can talk about anything without anger.
But if you’re on high and pissing on the people below you - if you’re a man, women; if you’re white, minorities; if you’re hetero, LGBT folks; if you’re judeochristian (in this country), other religions (or the nonreligious); etc - you’re being an ass. And if you want to be an ass, then, that’s fine. Just own up to it. Honestly, if you admit you’re being a jerk then, while it doesn’t absolve you of anything, at least it removes the pretense of propriety.
And yeah, this locks straight white men (with money) up into a box. Oh poo. Do what the truly clever comedians do and make fun of yourself. Or the country overall. You have to work harder to be funny and not a jerk. Like the rest of us have to work harder to make a living.
3. You can definitely rag on the people above you.
That’s your comedy gold mine. Do it. And even though you might make a few sympathetic men like me a bit sad for being lumped in with assholes, we’ll understand that it’s the assholes doing this, not you.
All this is to say: it’s a lot easier not to see your commentary as nasty if you’re not pushing a lower group down.
And leave out the slurs. You can make a really insightful point without resorting to lazy name-calling.
I happen to think a truly creative insult - one that calls up personal information and actually makes someone pause - is a lot better than calling a woman a “slut” or some stupid shit.
Or, you could not insult people. But, that’s advice I have yet to take. Heh. So here are my rules.
(Edited to add: and yeah, for those of you who know me, one of the most unpleasant people I’ve ever met was a woman who was big on “aw man I gonna offend all the peoples,” so this isn’t just a thing that men do, I know.)
I don’t even have much to say about Trayvon Martin. This isn’t a gender thing though - it’s color. But that being said, of course it was a dude who took it upon himself to be race-based Batman and chase a kid down for running away from a random dude chasing him.
You know, I used to hang out in a lot of random white neighborhoods. Not so much in NYC (there really is no such thing as a neighborhood where you won’t see any black people here; maybe Flushing, ha). But when I was at summer camp, or, particularly, when I worked, for a sad, annoying week, as a canvasser for Save the Children.
I was terrible at this job. Some days I brought in, like, twenty-five dollars, and some days I brought in, like, 250. But every day we wandered around random developments and bothered people in their homes. What we were doing was annoying but not criminal. Anyway, I could very easily have been mistaken for “troublesome” if Mr. Zimmerman had been around. I could have been Trayvon, easily. And I’m not brave enough not to run if a large man randomly comes running after me.
But I can’t even get mad. I’m just sad. I’m not shocked. I’m not surprised. I live in a world where people who self-identify the way I do (young black males) are considered to be criminals first and foremost. And many of us lose our lives or our livelihoods because of it.
I don’t have very much insightful to say. But it seems to be that the only men who go to clubs and do not act a complete fool (be it hitting on folks in a sketchy way, acting full of false bravado, etc) are the ones who go with their partner or friends and hang out with them.
Note: women don’t exactly act much better in the club. But it’s usually the men who are the aggressors and the one actually making people uncomfortable. So it’s on the list.
MYTH - Immigrants don’t pay taxes All immigrants pay taxes, whether income, property, sales, or other. As far as income tax payments go, sources vary in their accounts, but a range of studies find that immigrants pay between $90 and $140…
Hi, my name is Cara and I’m a 21 year old woman. Every 28 days, give or take, I have a period. And it fucking sucks. Today, was one of those where I take from the 28 day cycle. I wasn’t due for another period for…
First, drunken fool stumbling around the East Village at an intersection last night. He was trying to hug women, who wouldn’t have it - and at least he stopped when they moved away - and he also got way up on guys (not hugging, just staring at them). I put him here because he treated women differently but this guy seems most like a drunken dumbass. Still, he’s on the list.
Second, I ran (literally) to catch the express bus at 14th and 1st and went straight to the back to sit down. There were two women near the back, and I can’t pretend I didn’t notice their existence. Just after I sat down, though, three fucking halfwits came and sat down. One of them - sigh, a minority - passed them and said, loudly, “she real pretty, she real pretty.”
So, for most of the ride they were just audibly stupid (and drunk) but then, at, I dunno, 34th, the same guy turned to one of them and said, again, “Excuse me, miss, but you real pretty.” This, I think, is annoying and a microaggression, but it could have been worse. So, he immediately made it worse. She said thanks, and he thanked her for saying thanks since most women don’t. Which implies he goes around saying this shit all day long. Then he added, sigh, “Well it’s your fault for wearing that dress.” So he’s a sexual-harassment-apologist cliche.
I feel like I should have said something but as the women were just being annoyed rather than endangered I didn’t feel like getting into it with three large drunk people. So I just sat there and felt embarrassed to share a gender with them.
They got off before the women (and I) did and I immediately - and with humor - apologized “on behalf of my gender.” They laughed but the idiocy couldn’t be undone.
This isn’t really about me though. It’s about fuckers who weren’t raised right.
They’re on the list. And though they were drunk (and clearly mooching off their parents - you don’t live at 57th and 1st without a lot of money), that’s no excuse.
Fucking neanderthals. No, I bet neanderthals didn’t bother walking around saying “she real pretty.”
“It is hard for men and women leaders. But it is harder for women leaders. There are so many built in expectations, stereotypes, caricatures.”—Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, speaking to a packed crowd at Lincoln Center in the closing remarks at Newsweek & The Daily Beast’s Women in the World Summit. (via jessbennett)
I thought they were malfunctioning because the song kept stopping. But it turns out, not only can they turn up and down the volume, they can start stop and skip songs and return to the beginning of songs too. Which is great.
If I spend money I want it to be worthwhile!
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My headphones broke, which sucks because it was right at the beginning of my long run.
Thus I had to watch an hour of tvv, which sucks on sat afternoon so I watched the shows they provided (with captions).
And boy howdy. I’ve seen the show before, and it’s fine, but an hour of the Big Bang Theory is.. Lord Jesus that show gets old fast.
And it’s Sheldon who took Michael Scott’s last chance at an Emmy? Sheldon who beat Louis CK and Jack Donaghy too? Hell, even Leonard is better because he has more than one register.
But awards are dumb. Worse, Sheldon has his foot on Community’s neck and he’s probably going to finish off the assassination starting next Thurs. And that’s awful.
CBS should be everyone’s pop culture nemesis yet they’re bigger than all of the things (and viacom owns them and vh1 and mtv so… ew).
Mosby and co can move to another channel (or meet the damn mother and be done). Sheldon keeps getting bigger, too, now that he had awards love. Will we ever be rid of this braying donkey? I do not know.
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I’ve heard - on dating podcats, or in conversation - how a lot of (straight) guys want or expect a perfectly fit and trim woman and think anyone below what they consider a 9 or 10 isn’t that appealing.
But then a lot of these same guys don’t eat well or exercise with any regularity.
You don’t deserve a perfect-looking person just by existing (or at all, really). Step it up, lazy guys.
I was very clearly minding my own business on the subway this afternoon - to the point where I was staring at the floor - and I happened to look up and make eye contact with a guy across from me. Okay, fine. I look back down, he goes out of his way to get my attention by waving his hand where I can see it. I look up and all he’s doing is pointing at the ass of the woman standing nearby.
People don’t even care enough to conceal their leering, do they? And they want the rest of us to be in on it, too. Hmmph.
Because my birth mother was not trusted to have control of her own body, I was born unwanted. For several years I survived in the foster care system, before I was lucky enough to be adopted into a family who, while they weren’t perfect, had enough love to make up for their shortcomings.